The Art of the Hug

I am a hugger. I love giving them, and I LOVE Getting them. If someone looks like they need a hug, (even if they are a stranger to me) you can bet I'm gonna give one.


When I was living out in California, I was working in a bar/restaurant as a server. One afternoon, a woman came into the bar, sat down at a bar top, and ordered a drink.  I didn't know her- she just looked lost. The look on her face said she needed a hug, so I asked her if I could give her one. Without a word, she held her arms out and I hugged her. When we broke apart, she thanked me- she had just come from a funeral.


I believe that hugs are like handshakes- you can tell a lot about a person by the way they hug. Like a wimpy handshake, a weak hug is a colossal waste of time. 


A hug can mean many different things...
"Hi!"
"Welcome Back!"
"We won!!! WOO HOO!!!"
"I need you..."
"I want you."
"I love you."
"I'm sorry."


It's the best and most humane way to communicate to someone that you care. I'm not saying that every hug you give has to be all consuming and intense, but to me, a "fake" hug feels like an insult. You what I mean- I call it the Miss America Hug: arms are bent at the elbow so they don't go all the way around your body, a couple of pats on the back (like a baby being burped) and the push away. If you're going to hug somebody, mean it.


A hug, if it is sincere, (at any level) can be felt in your soul. It can last a few seconds, or a few minutes, or an eternity. It can energize you, revive you, recharge you, give you peace. Rock you to your very core and leave you breathless. (I've only had a few of those in my lifetime, and it brings back the same feeling just thinking about them.)


If I am remembered for anything, I hope its that I gave a good hug. After all- you never know if it will be the last chance you have to give one...